Eight

Yeah, yeah, I've not been around much. Sue me.

I'd much prefer if you'd shoot me right now. Why? Spring Break. Now, I know I'm not the only mom who dreads spring break as much as she looks forward to it. 5 days in a row of not having that god awful hour long commute twice a day? Hm... What else... I think that's about it. 5 days in a row of hearing, "Mom, we're bored.". 5 days of having to feed them more than once a day. (They get their own breakfast, eat lunch at school and I make dinner. Best. System. EVER.) 5 days of getting asked every 20 seconds, "Can we wake Daddy up."...

I expect my head to fully explode by Wednesday.I almost wish that I'd still be alive if my brain were to explode though... Because I'd want to see what G and L do with that mess... "You clean it up." "No, mom said YOU clean it up." "You dummy, mom's dead." "Oh, well then we'll leave it for dad and tell him S did it.".

Entertaining them was easier when they were younger. We'd pop in a Wiggles DVD and watch it or play "Come on, Meow Meow Meow" (Which is exactly what it sounds like. Crawling around the floor like cats.)... But now they want me to come outside and get my fat ass on the trampoline and play Super Mario Galaxy Vs. Ironman where I get to be the bad guy who's constantly getting up and down or jumping around to get away from the various Mario Items they are throwing at me. Gravity. friends. Gravity.

Or board games... Fuck, I hate playing board games with these two. G's at the cheating stage, and L's still at the state that everything causes a Threat Level Midnight meltdown. G cheats, L screams. L loses, G laughs, L throws a hissy fit. S laughs at L for throwing hissy fit, because honestly, WTF does S know. He's 10 months old. He thinks his brothers are hysterical... Which causes L to do this Gorilla type move that I'll to my best to explain.

He stands up or gets on his knees, femurs extended. He bows out his chest. He straitens this arms and points them behind him at a 45 to 90 degree angle, depending on his level of rage. He will then take in a huge amount of air, and hold his breath until the veins in his forehead and neck pop out and then start growl/screaming at us. Sometimes it comes out as a screech.

Not all this causes Dave and I to laugh more which makes L even more upset...

I take them to a park, and I hear, "We're hot." "We're hungry." "We're thirsty." "We're afraid of aliens abducting us."...

So really, is it so wrong of me to want to duct tape them to their beds for the next 5 days? (I say this as S is screaming at me for not paying attention to him...)

I'm going to need many very large rolls of duct tape.