One

So I've been told for a while that I need to start writing things down. Not everything, but the random bullshit things that happen to me on a daily basis. If you don't really know me, then you're asking, "Well, like what?".

Well, how about the time that L pepper sprayed himself while S was in the hospital last month?

G deciding that the MOST appropriate time to bust out a "That's what she said" joke was in front of the Administrative Dean at his elementary school's Culture Night? (And before you ask, yes, it was hysterical.)

Or S. Sweet little baby S... Becoming, well, a redhead.

I have a crazy mother, a father who doesn't give a damn, inlaws who believe that L needs to be medicated, and the absolute kicker. I'm married to a 30 year old man child who, last night, I kid you not, woke me up in the middle of the night to ask me where the peanut butter was.
"Did you look on the counter?" "On which counter?" "ARE WE FUCKING SERIOUS HERE?" "OH WAIT!", he yells from the kitchen, "I found it. Thanks.".

Because the world would stop turning if we didn't find the peanut butter at 3am.